Trying to Outrun the Blueprint

What are you most worried about for the future? Honestly? That I’ll spend the next 40 years exactly like the last 40, shrinking myself to fit into spaces that were never made for me. That I’ll never get out of the 9–5 grind, selling my soul in exchange for a wage that lines someone else’s […]

Shadow work & the patterns i couldn’t ignore anymore

I didn’t go looking for shadow work. It found me, in the quiet moments, the overreactions, and the patterns I kept calling “bad luck” or “just the way I am.” It showed up in the way I’d brace for rejection before I even opened my mouth. In the way I’d shut down over the tiniest […]

It’s Not All Candles and Calm, Is It?

How do you practice self-care? Well, that depends. Are we talking about the version that looks good on Instagram or the kind that actually helps? Because if it’s the polished kind, I whack on a face mask, light a candle that smells like lavender and false hope, and pretend a bubble bath has ever fixed […]

How Emotional Neglect Fuels a Lifetime of Overthinking

Earlier today, I answered the daily prompt question about “what I waste the most time on” (spoiler: it’s overthinking — and you can read that little brain spiral here), and I realised something bigger was brewing underneath it all. I don’t just overthink because I’m dramatic, anxious, or can’t make a bloody decision. I overthink because […]

Overthinking Like a Pro: My Daily Time Thief Exposed

How do you waste the most time every day? Overthinking. Not just the usual spirals, though trust me, I’ve done my fair share of “what did that text really mean?” and “did I sound weird in that voice note?” But it goes far deeper than that. I waste time on all the could have beens […]

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No Structure, No Filters, No Clue

Welcome to “Thirty Something (Plus VAT)“ Before we dive in, let’s get one thing straight — this blog isn’t here to give you the secret formula to healing, 10 steps to a better life, or any other neatly packaged nonsense. I’m not your guru, there’s no life coach certificate framed on the wall, I’m just […]

Behind The Smile: The Quiet Struggle Of Healing.

What we show the world isn’t always the truth we live with. There are days when healing feels like freedom. Like a clear breath. Like moving forward. And then there are days like this – quiet, heavy, and tearful, where I feel like I’m barely holding it together. You won’t always see these days. Online, […]

Stuck in the Shadows: When Growing Up Never Really Happens

Wherever You Put Me, I’ll Find The Edge

Corner-hugging, coat-clutching, and most comfortable with the breeze by the exit. Photo by p – on Unsplash You know the type. The ones who shuffle into any social event like they’re sneaking into a crime scene. The corner huggers. The people who hold onto their coats because putting them down would mean committing to staying. […]